Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Dogs, big and wee...

Mone the Dogs! They're noble wee beasties with dignity and heaps of personality. I'm costantly impressed with these hairy wee characters and think that we can learn allot from them about a bunch of stuff like unconditional love. They can be scunners as well likes, but generally I think they rock.

One of my favourate stories is about an Embra squatter called Allan Shopping-Trolley and his qudrapedal companion, 'Chaos'. Imagine our dreadlocked protagonist sauntering down Princess Street yelling "Chaos! Chaaa-oooooss! Come by lad" like a sheep trials entrant.

However, I dont really understand this strange belief that big dugs are in some way 'hard'. A meaty beast on the end of a leash is seen in some circles as a statement of manlyness for some reason. But for my part, I favour the wee yappy yins. Chihuahuas (sp?) the most. Why? Nobody suspects the pansy dogs!

Allow me to explain: if you see two Rotty's or Alsatians bounding down the street you'r like, "uh-oh... better keep ma witts about me here". No one fears a hound nicely sized for treading on. Wee ankle bothering dafties hold no terror for mortal man. At least not on their own.

But I recon that weight for weigh you could get you could get 40 or 50 wee dugs fer two healthy big wans. Imagine that! A veritable sea of nippy wee furballs! Like urban pirhanas, stripping an adult human to the bone in 20 seconds or less! An army of pedigree chum chomping locusts turning urban landscapes to deserts. Civilisation overwhelmed by feline freaking flash floods.

Hang on a mo - perhaps Paris Hilton isny as daft as she looks...

4 Comments:

Blogger pine-cones said...

i just saw two fluffy corgis getting walked on the royal mile. they were having fun.

12:27 am  
Blogger MaFt said...

a mate of ours has two chihuahua's - vicious little things, i tell ya! definately a pirhana on legs...

10:51 am  
Blogger pine-cones said...

the other day i saw a st bernard. not clear which end was tail and which was head, so profuse was the fur, in all directions spreading.

6:38 pm  
Blogger Dougleross said...

Sir - you are an inspiration :)

9:01 am  

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